“We gain control by letting go. We come to know by not knowing,” says Fr Michael Whelan SM as he explains the power of listening within.
Life, sooner or later – if we let it – leads us into the realisation that the more we know, the more we know we do not know. In other words, we experience the inexhaustible intelligibility of reality. This is what we call mystery. Life does have many problems that invite solutions. But life itself is not a problem. We should not look for solutions to life. Life is a mystery to be lived.
As in life, there are many problems in the Church that invite solutions. But, as in life, the Church – our life together in Christ – is not a problem to be solved but a mystery to be lived.
“Show us the way”
“Thomas said: ‘How can we know the way?’ Jesus said: ‘I am the Way . . . ’” (John 14:6). Thomas sees a problem and asks for a solution. Instead, Jesus invites Thomas – and us – into the Source of all mystery.
Here we are immersed in paradox. We gain control by letting go. We come to know by not knowing. We discover that true success in life comes as a gift rather than a conquest. We become fully alive by daily dying.
This demands commitment, hard work and patience. Letting go is not easy, not knowing can be very painful, surrendering can be frightening, dying daily can demand every ounce of courage that we can muster.
There has to be a lot of unlearning. Our learned inclination is to evade the discomfort of life’s paradoxes by reducing everything to problems which have solutions. Solutions promise control. So, we set about developing strategies and plans, aims and goals, we work out how we are going to get there . . . just like Thomas! However, if we care to listen, we will hear Jesus say repeatedly: “I am the way!” Then, and only then, will the problem solving make sense.
Listening within
The first work – and it is hard work – is listening. The first listening, without which all the subsequent listening will be more or less impeded, is listening to what is happening within. How I relate with myself is going to significantly affect how I relate with you. There is a helpful story from the Desert Fathers and Mothers:
One of the best-known of the Desert Fathers of fourth-century Egypt, Saint Serapion the Sindonite, travelled once on pilgrimage to Rome. Here he was told of a celebrated recluse, a woman who lived always in one small room, never going out. Sceptical about her way of life – for he was himself a great wanderer – Serapion called on her and asked: ‘Why are you sitting here?’
To this, she replied: ‘I am not sitting, I am on a journey’ [Jean-Marie Howe OCSO, Secret of the Heart: Spiritual Being, Cistercian Publications, 1999/2005, xiii].
Listening within can be aided by the practice of open questioning. Open questions are asked, not to find answers, but to be present in a non-judgemental and attentive way. Open questioning can help us face truth in our experience. Sometimes we would rather not face truth because it is painful. It may help to remember the rest of Jesus’ words to Thomas: “I am the way, the truth and the life” (John 14:6). Jesus – “the life” – comes to us disguised as truth.
Listening within can humble us. It can make us aware of our broken humanity – a humanity that we share with others. This can help move us beyond our prejudices and towards unity with others. The Spirit can thus lead us in a journey where “there is no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male and female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28).
Conversation and synodality
Conversation is crucial. It must play a central role in our lives, especially in our becoming Church. But real conversation does not just happen. Common usage of the word hides its true subtleties, challenges and life-giving possibilities.
Real conversation can, in fact, only happen when we are open to change through encounter with the other. Listening within can prepare us for this openness. If I approach conversation, thinking that I am right and you are wrong, there can be no real conversation. There might be arguments, discussion, debate, light-hearted pleasantries, but there will not be real conversation – unless I change.
Real conversation is at the very heart of synodality. There can be no synodality without real conversation and it is the nature of the Church to be synodal. Pope Francis reminds us that synodality is
“Journeying together … The word of God journeys with us. Everyone has a part to play; no one is a mere extra.” (Address to the Faithful of the Diocese of Rome, 18 September 2021).
Fr Michael Whelan SM is Director of the Aquinas Academy, Sydney.
There is less than 2 weeks to have a spiritual conversation with your friends, family or local community, to listen to where the Holy Spirit is guiding our local Church. Submit your stories, hopes and needs to the Synod before July 31 by visiting parracatholic.org/synod2023.
Bishop Vincent warmly invites applications for membership to the Diocesan Synod, which will be held on 12 to 15 October, 2023. As the Synod is a gathering of the Church, Synod Members are to be baptised Catholics and must be at least 18 years of age. The Synod has an agenda and process that makes it different from the broad consultation processes. Details of the selection criteria and requirements are available on the Synod website: parracatholic.org/synod2023_membership/. Applications close on 31 July.
This article was originally published in the 2023 Ordinary Time | Winter edition of the Catholic Outlook Magazine. You can read the digital version here.
