In a recent episode of The Spiritual Life podcast for America: The Jesuit Review produced by Maggie Van Dorn, Fr James Martin SJ spoke with theologian Fr Ron Rolheiser OMI about themes central to priestly discipleship but often left unspoken – chastity and celibacy.
Fr Ron, a renowned spiritual author, is “known for his profound spiritual insight and accessible writing,” said Maggie, noting his books include Sacred Fire, on “deeper human and Christian maturity”.
Defining spirituality as “how you’re playing or doing the game of discipleship,” Fr Ron linked prayer to daily life. Referring to the “monastic bell,” he explained that life’s demands – like raising children – call us to duty, not preference.
The danger, he said, lies in imbalance.
“If you are habitually busy – that’s a sign you have to pray,” he said.
Fr Ron added that commitment to someone – including God – runs deeper than head or heart.
“Anyone who’s been in a relationship for a length of time will know that there will be days and seasons when your head isn’t in it, your heart isn’t in it – but you’re in it.
“And not only that – you mean it.”
On the topic of chastity, Fr Ron admitted this had been challenging for him in his life as a priest.
“You’re young, you fall in love, or someone falls in love with you – it’s almost obsessional,” he said.
“There were hard things to work through, particularly in my case, it was to do with celibacy.”
He ultimately described chastity as a form of reverence.
“Chastity is how we stand before life… It’s about reverence, respect. I believe it’s one of the most important virtues there is.”
Celibacy, Fr Ron said, is not sadistic but a discipline that carries a real cost.
“When [I] go to bed alone at night, I’m in solidarity with the real poor of this world,” he said.
“I have the luxury of taking a vow of celibacy.”
He cautioned that the true danger is not suffering with celibacy, but “becoming selfish and having no one to call you on it.”
Watch the full podcast on YouTube or read an article by Fr James Martin SJ in America: The Jesuit Review.
