Women across Western Sydney and the Blue Mountains have been reminded that even when they don’t see themselves as worthy or have the best self-image, they are worthy and loved by God.
A group of more than 40 women gathered recently for Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering, which focussed on a topic close to women’s hearts – ‘Seeing yourself through God’s eyes: approaching self-image’.
With a multi-billion-dollar industry taking advantage of women’s insecurities and the constant stream of algorithm-fed social media pressuring them to look and be their best, the women found hope that they are more than what they are being told they are.
Working in the fashion industry for about 18 years from her mid-20s, Lindsay Nakhoul, Executive Assistant to the Dean of Our Lady of Lebanon Co-Cathedral, Harris Park, felt God tugging on her heartstrings and showing her that she was a daughter of God and a sister of Christ.
“God was showing me how I project myself in the world and revealed that I was, and continue to be, a temple for the Holy Spirit, and what a privilege and honour [that is] to be,” Lindsay said.
Executive Assistant to the Dean of Our Lady of Lebanon Co-Cathedral, Harris Park, Lindsay Nakhoul (right) speaks during Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering in Parramatta. Image: Mary Brazell/Diocese of Parramatta
“The more confident I became in our Lord’s plan for me, the way I projected my self-image took a completely different turn.”
Wife and mother Laura Neeson, from the Areté Centre for Missionary Leadership, shared a similar experience of working in the fashion industry, explaining that her self-worth was measured in material achievements and possessions and trying to measure herself to those around her in the industry.
She shared that in her darkest moment in her mid-20s, she felt a powerful, tangible experience of God’s love, which she’d never experienced before or knew could happen to her.
“When I hated myself, that’s where He met me and poured out this love that I can’t put into words. He gave me mercy that I didn’t deserve.
“He met me there and loved me, but he didn’t leave me there. He invited me to have a relationship with Him and showed me what it was to follow Him.”
Laura Neeson (centre) from the Areté Centre for Missionary Leadership speaks during Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering in Parramatta. Image: Mary Brazell/Diocese of Parramatta
Through high school, first-time male panellist Fr Chris Ryan MGL from St Declan’s Parish, Penshurst, struggled with not being seen as a “Marist product” because he was more academically gifted than being good at sport.
Showing a small interest in faith in Year 11, Fr Chris was encouraged by his homeroom teacher to go on a retreat. What struck him most was the retreat leaders showed a genuine interest in who he was.
“I’d been trying really hard to portray something to the world – be this person to someone, be this person to my parents, be this person to the guys I played sport with – and they saw through that without any judgement,” he said.
“I didn’t know the language for it back then, but that was very healing for me – their acceptance of me and that they genuinely wanted to know me, they didn’t want to know the image I was portraying.
Fr Chris Ryan MGL from St Declan’s Parish, Penshurst (right), speaks during Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering in Parramatta. Image: Mary Brazell/Diocese of Parramatta
“They talked about the person of Jesus in a way I’ve never heard anybody talk about before. I might have heard that the Lord loved me in a personal way, but these people talked about it in such a way that I wanted what they had.
“There’s a security that comes when you know that you’re loved. You don’t have to try so hard.”
When asked what someone can do when they don’t feel worthy of God’s love, the panel emphasised that God never abandons us and was made to join us in our messiness and unworthiness.
Fr Chris said, “The heart of the Gospel is that God loves us right in the midst of our unworthiness and lifts us up.
“There’s a line in 2 Corinthians (8:9) that says, ‘although he was rich, he became poor for your sake, so that he might make you rich’.
“We are all poor and that sense of unworthiness is real in all of us in some way at some time or another. Whatever you feel your pit is – your sense of unworthiness – God comes into that pit and pulls you out.”
The panel discussion during Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering in Parramatta. Image: Mary Brazell/Diocese of Parramatta
Lindsay said, “We don’t need to do anything to feel worthy of His love, as if it’s a checklist. We just need to allow our Lord to reveal Himself to us. We need to give Him our time.
“We need to trust and we really need to surrender to Him, because He loves us beyond words.
“God sent His Son; He sacrificed His Son for our sins and for our brokenness. He wants what’s best for us. God’s done all the work, all we need to do is be willing to receive and to accept.”
Panel moderator Joy Adan said, “It is often the case that God will meet us at our worst, but he also meets us in the little things.
“God listens to our little prayers as much as he listens to our big prayers. Sometimes we think, ‘this is too dumb for God to care about’ – nothing is too dumb, so don’t be afraid to give those little prayers to Him.”
Young women in discussion during Catholic Youth Parramatta’s At the Well gathering in Parramatta. Image: Mary Brazell/Diocese of Parramatta
To ensure that their identity is rooted in Christ and not influenced by the distractions of the world, Laura told the women that although the world shapes an algorithm of messages based on the choices women make in their day-to-day lives, it is important that they search for content and input that is positive and affirming and to not be afraid to do an audit on the type of content they are consuming.
Fr Chris encouraged the women to go to Mass and to spend time in Adoration, because when they receive the Eucharist and reflect on that gift, they become part of Jesus and Jesus becomes a part of them.
“If you want to get a clear sense of your self-image, falling in love with Jesus in the Eucharist – I don’t know if you can do better than that.
“As St Paul said (Galatians 2:20), you want to be able to say, ‘it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me. The life I live is with the Son of God who loved me and died for me.’”
The next At the Well in-person gathering will be held on Friday 9 November. Keep an eye on the Catholic Youth Parramatta’s Facebook and Instagram channels for information closer to the date.
Learn more about the women’s ministry in the Diocese of Parramatta on the Diocesan website.
View images from the most recent At the Well gathering here or below.
